My long summer

I hardly know here to begin, but at least I am feeling well enough to talk about my summer now. It actually started in the spring. I had a sore throat in March but thought I was just recovering from basketball and a cold practice gym in February. However, when the fever didn't go away the whole month of March I knew it was time to go to the doctor the first of April. They were also concerned that my blood pressure was a little higher than usual. When I was 30 I had been diagnosed with mitral valve prolapse and had ultra sounds to confirm. Then we moved and my doctor retired and I had not needed meds anymore anyway so I hadn't worried about it. In my 40's it started acting up again so I went to a new heart doctor who proudly proclaimed that MP was widely overdiagnosed and that I did not have it. I found his odd since I had seen several ultra sounds... But he's the doc so I went with it.... Until this April. It felt too familiar. So with the heart fever and sore throat I went to the doctor. I wa expecting antibiotics, but first got sent to the cardiologist who pronounced (and confirmed through ultrasound) that I have MP. Imagine that! However, he said my heart was holding up fine for my age. Boy, I'm already tired of that phrase, but I was relieved to hear that. Unfortunately, the symptoms remained and my follow up was with the NP and she said, "I'm afraid you might have either voice box or throat cancer." I was shocked and sickened at the same time. I still had a month of school left and my mind raced. She sent me to an ear, throat, nose doc and he put a scope through my nasal cavity and numb sprayed my throat. To our relief, he did not find anything. We thought we were all clear and left, but ended up back the next week because he was concerned with my swollen lymph node that wouldn't go down and I still had the fever and hoarseness. He feared lymph node cancer and sent me for a contrast MRI of my neck and sinuses. The iodine was not something I'd car to do again. I could taste it. I stressed through the week, even sicker with worry. The test came back within normal range for my age. Tired of the stress, no answers, and everyone telling me I probably had cancer, I decided to try some other routes. I went to the dentist to rule out a tooth infection and to talk about tmj which I have always had. My teeth were fine. No cavities as usual and my gums looked healthy, so no infection. Then we talked about my TMJ and my swollen neck. He said he thought I had sleep apnea and that a lot of people with TMJ have it. He sent me to a TMJ specialist who agreed based on my husband's report of my sleep habits. Apparently I did some things I wasn't aware of. I clench because my jaw falls back, along with my tongue and blocks my airway. So off to the sleep study to confirm. You spend the night at a sleep center. You have a private room and nurse. She hooked me up to a multitude of wires that measured brain activity, restless legs, heart, breathing, everything. I didn't think I'd sleep, but I did. Then back to a sleep doc for the results. He said my apnea was mild to moderate. Mild on my side and moderate on my back. I stop breathing about 20x a night on my back, but only 9 if I don't stay on my back! I thought, "Holy cow! How many times is severe?!" I also thought I had acid reflux so I went to a gastro specialist he next week. She evaluated me, felt the swollen lymph node, read all the reports and told me I probably had breast cancer or lymphoma because the lymph node was triggered by something. There it was.... The "C" word again. I had tried to forget it. She sent me for my mammogram. It was stable (I have cysts but they are benign) so if they don't change they consider them stable, but the radiologist was also concerned with the lymph node in my neck and ordered an ultrasound of my right armpit (home of more lymph glands) just to be safe. Those too were normal. But then the back pain that seemed minor compared to the throat, up to this point, got worse. I panicked and we headed to the ER? He felt it was a muscle problem and not cancer. FINALLY someone who didn't use the C word! Back to my gastro with good news. She scheduled an endoscopy to,check the damage of the reflux and to biopsy my smal intestine as she was still convinced she would find cancer. I had just finished summer school at this point and was very stressed. The endoscopy confirmed the reflux problem and found ulcers in my stomach and asophpogus, but no cancer. So many prayers answered you have no idea. So many times we would celebrate only to be told it was probably cancer again. My poor husband! Then the night of my endoscopy surgery I started to have jerking muscles at night. Back to ER via ambulance. I was severely dehydrated (poor instructions by the gastro doc for after surgery precautions). They pumped the fluids in me for several hours and also felt I had a reaction to the anesthetic so gave me something for that too. The dehydration had also caused a urine infection so antibiotics for that too. Did I mention my poor husband. So I went on a strict diet for the reflux (I'm still on it) and one week in, the three month fever broke. I also had an ultrasound of my midsection (gallbladder, liver, kidney, spleen), so they could rule out those organs. All good! The neck is still swollen and I'm still convinced its from clenching though they may just remove the lymph node if it doesn't go down. I had a special mouthpiece (top and bottom) made and it was supposed to stop the apnea and clenching. It was horrid and didn't do either. So today, I gave in and got fitted for the CPAP mask/machine (which I brought home). My husband will now be sleeping with an alien. At least the alien will be breathing! Oh yes, and in the meantime, my hip started acting up again. They sent me for a lower lumbar MRI because my physical therapist (PT) wasn't comfortable working on my back till they ruled out cancer. Apparently the electricity they use on their machines can stimulate cancer. Yikes! Good news... No cancer, but I have a bulging disc and arthritis. Oh, and my annual skin doctor check-up was squeezed in (no alarming moles), and my pap smear (still waiting for those results). So I am now in PT for my TMJ (neck) and seeing a back doctor for my disc. I have one final cancer test they want me to have and that is scheduled for Sept. it's my colonoscopy. If I pass that one.... I am not kidding... I am going to throw a party! It has been the most stressful summer of my life! I don't know what I would do without my husband. He has been my rock. I watch the way some people treat their spouse's health problems and I am sickened. Your inner self begins to be affected and I credit my husband for keeping my head above water. I also thank the Lord. I am thankful for a daughter who sensed my troubles without being told and came to help clean, and spend the night at times. I am thankful for Jason and Anne also sensing a problem and helping us pack. This has been difficult, but we're almost through it and it has made me aware of so many health things. It has changed a lot of what we eat, how we eat, and how I value every single day. No amount of money can make up for. Life shortened by poor health choices. I'm also cutting back on stress. Again, I'm thankful for a spouse who works to reduce my stress load and who builds me up. One more hurdle and I will be clear. Everything but my brain will have been tested. I am going to get this back stronger and my neck muscles loosened. I'm going to count my blessings and enjoy every minute I am blessed with!

Hello Again!

I never thought I'd quit blogging after doing it so faithfully for almost two years. After sitting out a few months, I now realize what therapy it was for me and also that it serves a lot like a diary for me. So.... I'm back. I've probably lost everyone (all five of you) but it's still good therapy. Too much happened in the last three months to try to completely catch up, but it's sufficient to say that it has been a very busy three months. We put our house on the market in May and had an offer on it the next day. Then the "pre-approved" buyers' financing fell through near the closing date and we had to put it on the market again. Same thing- an offer within the first few days, but this time we also kept it on the market until we were 100% sure of financing. Good thing. That one fell through too! Luckily a third one was right behind it and we are keeping all available fingers and toes crossed that this one actually closes on August 8th. That means we have been looking at larger houses to buy. This one is just so small when we all get together. The payment has been awesome though! :) We have found a couple of homes we really liked but both want more than they're worth, so we're back out again tomorrow looking and hopefully putting in an offer. If not, we will be moving in with Jeremy and Stacy for a little stay. :) :) I taught summer school this year so summer has seemed very short and rushed. It did give me time to continue working on some educational projects/presentations and my presentation to BSU this week went very well. More to come on that later. We also did a camping weekend up at Pine with my brother Bob and his family, along with Jason and Anne and the girls. That was fun. Camping Comment of the Weekend: (after screaming) "Did you see the antlers on that bug! They were huge!" (by Jackie Andre) :)Love you Jackie! Of course, watching Maddie eat a smore was pretty priceless too. When we got back we headed to a couple days of R&R at Skamania Lodge near Cascade Locks, Washington. It's by the Columbia Gorge and it was absolutely beautiful. I'd definitely recommend it. Drove over to the Portland D.I. to pick up some books for Jeremy while were there too. Came home with some of the biggest cherries I've ever seen. There was a little market set up under the "Bridge of the Gods" which was near our resort. There were also some vendors selling fresh salmon from the river. They cut and fileted it right there for us. It was awesome tasting-- so flavorful and fresh. The drive back was gorgeous and the time away was nice. It was the 4th of July when we came back. We made it back in time for a family BBQ at our house. The kids had it all put together so it was nice to come home to. Middleton also has some awesome fireworks for a little town. Enjoyed having Bob and Jackie over as well as two of our children and their families. Fun day! Date year #33 with the hubby. Yep, our first date was the 4th of July. It's always a special day. We have just a couple more weeks before we start packing up the house. I just can't believe how fast summer is going. Makes me sad. The heat can speed up and leave though! HOly cow! Triple digits triple days in a row are not the norm here! And the humidity is weird as well. I feel like I'm in Iowa or something! Baby Kalijah is growing into another bighead baby. Mandy has her hands full with three boys! They have been battling the cycling illnesses in their family as have our other children. So many yucky things going around they've actually cancelled church classes for the children at times. Through it all they have continued to grow and recover though and I continually pray for their health and safety. We love them so much and are so proud of how our children's families are growing and learning. It was sad to hear about that little five year old boy who drowned at Star yesterday. So sad. On a happier note, I also had the chance to go to Wild Rose Manor and check out the grounds with Korinne as she prepares for her September wedding. Nice little place and I'm excited to help. In fact, that's my next calendar item: decorating party for her wedding decor this Saturday. Looking forward to some girl time. Papa is going to head off to the zoo with his sons and all the g-kids. I'm sure there's much more than this over the last three months, but this kind of catches me up and since I'm turning the big 5-0 very soon, it's normal for me to forget things! :)

Blogger Moment

I have been terrible about blogging this past month-- so much going on I just seriously didn't have time. All five of you followers... please forgive me. :) Tonight, my husband inspired me to return to the blog. It was a "blog moment" that can't go unnoted.

I have been clenching at night again and my muscles are getting pretty tight and I decided to break down and try the mouthpiece again. It's like wearing a football mouthguard. At least you can buy them in the store now. You used to have to go to your dentist and people were like, "Hey, that looks just like the ones we wear for football." So yeah, it pretty much is. Anyway, since the husband is the x-football player I decided to give it a shot. He got the water boiling and I went to find the instructions. Much to my dismay when I returned with the instructions he already had the mouthpiece in the water even though I knew it was supposed to be timed. I was so busy trying to start the timer I failed to notice (in the full 50 seconds it is allowed to be in the boiling water) that he was holding it in the water (not just letting it go) and he was holding it with metal tongs. He was holding it (melting plastic) with metal tongs. Gee.... what's wrong with that picture?!

Just as I'm starting to say, "Don't...." he is grabbing the plate and squeezing the tongs. So much for me using my teeth to mold the melting plastic into place. Then he says (as I examine the mutilated mouthpiece), "It'll be fine, just try it." Not wanting to go buy another one, I pick it up and it sticks to my finger and flings against the cupboard and down to the floor. He quickly retrieves it, tries to remove the new single strand of hair (if you click on the picture it's still there) and who knows what else off of it and says, "It'll still work." REally!!!???

I'm off to clench my teeth some more. I will write about more plesant things like Seattle and our new grandbaby another day this week. :)

Here we go round the Mulberry Bush....

So we are getting chubby together. So.... we are now officially exercising and eating better together. The husband finally seems to be ready to take it seriously. He's been more aware of his calories (and protruding belly) and seems to be ready to "do this". It was kind of fun doing our old people stretches and exercises together tonight and feeling like we can do this together. I did it alone, but without his willingness to live and eat the same lifestyle, I just gained it all back. It was too easy to eat out together and let him baby me with all these treats, etc. No can do. Sometimes, but not so much.
My hip is still bothering me, but it's going to do that whether I exercise or not and I can't wait any longer to start exercising again, so we're just going for it. Sunday was so beautiful that it inspired both of us. We were going to go play some pinochle with my mom and dad but dad got called out on the ambulance. We did enjoy a beautiful, lazy Sunday with just each other anyway. Kind of weird not seeing the kids, but it was still nice. We even went for a drive and scoped out some potential houses and crossed some off of our favorites list.
With spring arrives a new sense of hope and things to come. We are both ready to move into a bigger house and have a place for the grandkids to really play. Patience.... I know. We are headed to Seattle next week and we're hoping for good weather so we can drive. I'm looking forward to seeing my best friend while we're up there and maybe even go snowmobiling with them up at their cabin if the roads are good.
Oh, and I must mention that I got to see Jac this weekend-- a former player. She is one of those kids that I became very close with and she's married now and soon to be headed into her final year of college. I loved visiting with her, catching up, and just seeing her grow into the wonderful adult I always knew she would be. I just love her and it helped fill my cup. Another thing that fills my cup is watching Daisha play in her basketball games and all the little cousins hanging out while she plays. And this Saturday she is getting baptized. What a special day. Tomorrow we go pick out her dress and I just can't believe she's that old already.
So many blessings and I get to share each step with my forever love. :) I'm a lucky girl.

Basketball, Blah Weather, and a New Doo

Well, the month is almost over finally and I will try to get back on track with my blog. What a slacker! Our varsity team made it to state. (Hooray!) We ended up bringing home the Consolation trophy for the state and it's the first trophy Meridian's had since the early '80's so it was quite the big deal. I just love the whole state experience and even though we didn't get to watch as many of the other teams as we usually do, it's something the husband and I both really enjoy being a part of. In fact we talked about how when we get too old to coach we'll be one of those host families (true story) that hosts a team. I would so spoil them.

I also love eating the cinnamon roasted almonds, drinking way too much chocolate milk, and visiting with Deb and Moose every year. Deb and I always fall right back into where we left when I was her assistant. It's hard to believe she was my coach in high school because now she just feels like one of my closest friends. Perhaps that's because she was very young when she was my coach. At any rate, we always have fun with them.

Then of course there's always the thrill of the games. And wouldn't you know it that it'd come down to Eagle v. Meridian again for the trophy. Repeat. We both get in the car-- one wearing blue and one wearing green. We part at the door. One comes home a winner-- one... not a winner. Repeat. Eagle goes down. Meridian wins! (crowd noise). And now I drive awkwardly home after school wondering what to do with myself. Okay, well, not completely true. Thursday night auction.... I'm Back! American Idol... I'm back! Grandkids.... I'm still here. :) We had Maddy and Daisha over last weekend and Maddy is such a giggler (until papa tells her she has to go night night). Mommy, daddy, mommy daddy. Too funny. Did I mention Daisha is playing basketball! :) :) :) Had her first game last Saturday and yes, even made a basket. She has quite a cheering section as well. With her dad and Papa as her coach, it could get intense. Well, as intense as a 2nd grader can get. :) Bradley Bean also had his first birthday and Jeremy BBQ'd for that and Bradley loved his cake.

Mandy is still pregnant, which is good since she gave us a little scare about having the baby too soon. She went to the doctor Wednesday and the boys came to school with me for a little while. That was entertaining. :) Then they MADE me take them to Krispy Kremes (I just realized I've never spelled that). The baby is still measuring a little small which is VERY odd considering she births giants. Keep them in your prayers.

Jason just happens to be going to the same conference in Seattle that the husband and I are going to so we will all get to be in Seattle at the same time. I'm pretty excited about that trip! I'm also excited about my new haircut. I always get it cut and sometimes highlighted as soon as basketball is over and the ponytail is no longer my most popular hairdo.

I'm ready for spring. I'm ready to be in a bigger house where I can put all my stuff away. I'm ready to just feel more sunshine pretty much. Tomorrow is Friday and I am so thankful. Primary Activity Saturday. Daisha's bball Saturday. March is next week! Hooray! May the whisperings of spring fill your heart with anticipation and the new month bring you new blessings! Don't beware the Ides of March! WElcome March! (Yes, I'm in the middle of Julius Caesar presentations). :)

Why is February so long when it's so short?

February is always one of the longest months of the year for me. It's the time of year when we have all crashed from our holiday highs and we eat too many chocolate hearts and we are so tired of cold weather. Spring Fever!
Now that I've vented...
The team I am assisting with made it to state. yeah! Big week next week then basketball is over. Well high school basketball. The husband and our oldest son are coaching the oldest granddaughter's YBA team. I simply cannot believe I have a grandchild old enough to FINALLY play. Grandpa said they made her cry though so I am nervous. It was nothing serious (they told her to box out)but needless to say, crying made both men uncomfortable. I secretly smiled (well it's not secret anymore) not because she cried-- that made me sad-- but because they always make a big deal out of it when one of my players cry. Plus neither one of them like drama. :) Then we went to Jason's game tonight and he coaches boys (high school age) and one of his players cried. Okay boys.... I do not want to hear about me anymore!
Jason's boys won and are headed into districts. Good job j-bob. I can hardly wait to see the granddaughter play (and the boys coach) this next weekend too. And hopefully we are bringing home some hardware for the team I'm with.
On an non-basketball note I decided that I needed to stop waiting for the hubby (and my hip to heal) to start exercising again. I tried to get him to go shoot around with me this morning but he drug his feet so I decided to go in the other room and just do the 20 min. workout that I used to do almost every day last year. Then I decided he needed to do it too. The coach in my took over and I whipped him into shape. I clearly told him we were doing three sets and after the first one he was asking for a timeout to get a drink etc. and I said, "Nope! Not till we're done!" He acted like he was dying but honestly we're talking very low impact stuff-- not PX90 or anything remotely close to that. Then I told him we were going to clean the house real fast (that burns calories too). And.... I said, "no pop today" and he did everything I asked him to. He was a wee bit grouchy this evening but I bet he sleeps well tonight and I felt a lot better after doing the exercises.
Rellie and Kayson came to spend the night and we watched Maddi and Abbi Jo while Jason and Anne went to Stake Conference, so it's been a full but blessed day, but tomorrow we will rest.

Checking in

I will return to being funny or reflective after the basketball season is over. The goal is to end at state. It has been an interesting experience/journey as always and having another grandbaby on the way is another "soon to be" journey we are awaiting as well. Sickness, pregnancy, work, weird weather, and a small house. Is it summer yet? I love summer. This is random, but reflects my current schedule/state of mind. I love my family and I'm looking forward to both Seattle and Italy. That's all for now folks.

It's the thought that counts.... or is it?

Well the crazy nails didn't help us beat them. In fact, we played terrible. All three teams had a bad night. It happens. At least I tried something new. And I enjoyed the activity. I give 100% at every game. I expect players to do the same. Their 100% has different results based on their ability, but I only get upset when someone doesn't give 100%. I take that back, I also get upset when they make excuses for not giving 100%. That said, sometimes it's one of those nights when you just go "okay, the kids who don't get to play a lot.... you're on". If the top kids are getting beat and the game gets out of reach in the 4th, you have to let them (the bench kids) play. It makes the score uglier sometimes, but at least they get to play. What a rollercoaster this game has been in my life. You have to take the dips with the high rises though. It makes you keep working at the game and yourself. :) Monday's a new day and the scoreboard starts over for the next game. Thank goodness! And my nails will be plain again. :)

A New Year! A fun team bonding activity for basketball

We are already putting together our trip to Italy. I know it's still seven months away, but you have to get your passports six months in advance and figure out if you're going to go with a tour or on your own and where you want to visit while you're there, etc. We have had fun looking at all of our options and realizing that we will be there before we know it. Turning 50 this summer will be so much easier knowing that we are able to enjoy the fruits of our labors these past 50 years.

Christmas break was wonderful. We had days of crazy busyness and days of nothingness (relaxation). I have returned to school with new energy and ambition and ideas. We are also planning a trip to Seattle in March and we are combining business with pleasure as we attend a conference and new technology for the classroom. There are devices and software applications that are breaking edge and we will have the opportunity (together) to try some of these out and learn about them for each of our school districts. At the same time we will make some evening time to visit my best friend from high school. She and her husband live in Seattle. Plus, we'll have some "us" time. I am very excited for that trip as well.

Basketball has been a rollercoaster, but our varsity program is really doing well. I believe we are in 2nd place now. We've won about 6 in a row I believe. We have a game tonight, so I am excited to see how all of our teams do. Our JV team had a great team bonding activity last night. Good thing... we play the number one, undefeated team tonight. We almost had them last time, so we're going for it (as always). I dreamed up this crazy activity that I thought they might think was a little "corny" but they already know I'm a little "out there" anyway, so I thought I'd try it. I called it "because I love you". Most girls, no... all girls have insecurities. We also get caught up in our stats and wins and losses and at this point in the season we can start thinking that we're on our own islands if we're not careful. So, I thought we needed to know that through this journey called a season, we have grown close together and that the life lessons are as important as the trophies or even absence of trophies. It's my job to make this a journey they will cherish, win or lose, and I have been doing things to create memories, but I've never done this one before, so I was a little apprehensive.

So... here's what we did: I had them each bring a bottle of fingernail polish. Yes, fingernail polish. We went out in a large hallway (for ventilation purposes) and I have 11 players, but one just left for a national cow convention, yes, cow convention. Anyway, I became the #11 person since she was gone. This actually worked out even better in hindsight. That means we each paint one fingernail on each player (because you don't paint your own). As you paint your "special color" on their nail you must tell them "I love you because....." and they fill in the rest. The conversations I heard as I joined in were very touching and very needed. I saw girls tearing up and I even teared up as they said "Coach, I love you because..." I even had some insecurities dispelled because of what followed the word because. We are all loving by nature (especially when we know we are loved back) and I watched the smiles grow and the laughter get louder as we finished. Not only were nails crazy funny, but the we felt better on the inside as we headed to practice.

Before the nail activity I also did another activity. It was a "normal" one that has been done before, but I adapted it for basketball. I had 10 brown lunch sacks with a heart and different number on the front. Inside each bag was a small bag of valentine hearts-- the hard ones. One bag though had a 6 pack of lip glosses in it plus the hearts. They each picked a bag and I began reading a "left-right" story that I wrote and each time they heard the word "left" or "right" they had to pass their bag that way in the circle. Most people know this gift activity. The story was about having heart and the heart of a champion. When they ended, I asked them about the bag that was different. Some were afraid it was bad because it was different, some wanted it more because they thought it was better. We talked about trusting, following my instructions/coaching anyway, and about hidden rewards. Then we ate pizza, then we did the nails.

At the end of practice I always ask my captains to talk. One of my captains said that already, even at practice, when she looked at her crazy nails that she remembered what each person had said to her and it made her feel better and made her want to work harder for her team. Now we'll see if our crazy nails help us knock of #1 tonight of if they just make us smile. Either way, a larger victory was won last night. I need to remember that as a coach.

I also was SO grateful to have my son Jeremy (and Daisha and Tucker) come to practice to help out last night. Just having him there made me feel less tired and also gave me the opportunity to do post/guard splits and do some much-needed work with my posts. Thank you Jer!